Self-Image: Learning to love ourselves


The most important words you will ever say, are the words you say to yourself.

SJ White

Troy and I are working for an internet book sales company. I’m the warehouse manager and he’s one of our receiving clerks. He is a smart young man, but for some reason, his get up and go has got up and gone.

One morning I decided to ask Troy the big question, “Troy, what’s with you? You walk around like a zombie with his ankles tied together. Did you run out of toilet paper at your house?” “I’m not a morning person, SJ,” he says. “Well, maybe you need to get an afternoon job.” We laugh it off, we always do. That’s because Troy and I are more than coworkers, we’re Buds. 

Troy’s problem is a lot more common than most of us realize. His self-image, on a scale of one to ten, is a two. It’s no wonder the man’s get up and go has got up and gone. With a self-image like that his chances of making the most of his abilities are slim and none. Once I help convince Troy there is another Troy within, (I cannot lie, that took some doing) the mental picture he once had of himself begins to change. He starts to walk with purpose, his chin no longer rests on his chest, he smiles more often, and he is full of new ideas. It wasn’t long before Troy moved on to another job, one that paid him a lot more money than we ever could. Once he had convinced himself he was worth more, and I must admit, he stumbled a few times, but once he got it down, there was no stopping him. 

“Troy was living proof that the mental picture we have of ourselves can either help us or hurt us. Once he started seeing himself as the person he wanted to become, a new Troy emerged. That’s because our minds can only act on the data we feed it. Troy was feeding his mind a steady diet of negative thoughts, before he turned it all around. Start seeing yourself as the person you want to become. Use your creative imagination to visualize yourself as that person. It works. For example, did you ever worry about something to the point it made you sick, and it ends up never happening? That’s your creative imagination making you feel as if the event, that may or may not happen, is actually happening at that moment. Your emotions cannot tell the difference. You’ve convinced your mind it’s the real deal. Fortunately, it works both ways.”

You may say, SJ, I’m not always up to making these changes you talk about. Some days I feel like it, some days I don’t. Here’s a little something I want you to keep in mind. A feeling motivates any action you take, generally speaking. I think we all get that, you feel like doing something – you do it. And, when you really feel like doing something, you do it well. What we need to work on is how to motivate ourselves when we don’t feel like doing what we should be doing. Fortunately, there is a way to do that.

Like our creative imaginations, action and feeling work both ways. It’s up to us to switch gears when the need arises. And the need has definitely arisen anytime you find yourself telling a coworker, “I’m not a morning person.” By controlling the action, which is under your control, you can indirectly control the feeling, which is not directly under your control. Fact of the matter is – our emotions are not always subject to reason, but they are subject to action.

 Perfect example: its workout time and I’m just not feeling it. I have two choices. I can start pumping iron, or not. Or not is out of the question. So, I do what I always do when I feel this way, I push my feelings aside and dive right in. Ten minutes later I’m running on energy I had no idea I had. I end up doing a few extra sets. The action created the feeling I needed to get the job done. Always does, no matter what the job. Check out the bullet points below…

  • Start seeing yourself as the person you want to become.
  • Your mind can only act on the data you feed it, so be cautious of the things you say to yourself.
  • Actions trigger feelings, just as feelings trigger actions. Even though emotions are not always subject to reason, they are subject to action.
  • Remember, we cannot outperform the limitations we put on ourselves.
  • Form good habits and make them your master.
  • Always be the best you – you can possibly be. After all, everyone else is taken.

What others think of us is not nearly as important as what we think of ourselves.   

SJ White


Don’t forget to SUBSCRIBE to our list for the latest updates. 


Spread the word

This Post Has 2 Comments

  1. Ok Sam White you sure hit on a lot of things I’m dealing with and I’m one to credit where it’s do You’ve already helped me .Thanks for sharing that wisdom with me

    1. Thank you. One of the reasons I’ve always thought so much of you is – you keep it real. Thank you, Cliff

Leave a Reply

Close Menu